You've been with me my whole life, through thick and thicker. Whatever's happened, you've been there.
And I hate you for it.
You ruin everything. You slow me down, hold me back, make me look weak and lazy. You've ruined my clothes, kept me from doing what I want, where I want, when I want, with who I want. You make me uncomfortable everywhere I go. You make me hate myself.
I've tried getting rid of you. Tried everything I can think of. But it never works. Sometimes you go away for a while, but I can't forget you. I think about you every day, at every meal, at every activity, until you come back bigger, louder, and more annoying than ever before.
But this time, I'm going to kill you. Not like the other times, where I thought I could do it fast, rip you off like a bandaid. No, this time I'm going to do it slowly, painfully. I'm going to starve you. I'm going to run you into the ground. Oh, you'll fight it, I know you will, try to talk me out of it, beg for mercy and maybe some doughnuts. But I won't give up. You'll get weaker and weaker, you'll start fading away, and then one day, you'll be gone. Finally.
I'll be all alone. Reborn. Ready to start fresh, to build a new life without you.
I'll be skinny. I'll finally have gotten rid of you, the millstone around my waist. I'll be free. And thin. And happy.